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Talking to your Kids about #MeToo
The CDC estimates that 1 in 6 boys and 1 in 4 girls are inappropriately touched or sexually abused prior to turning 18 years-old.
One of the biggest factors that parents need to intermittently but consistently discuss with their children is that of consent and what the definition truly means regardless of gender. Optimally these conversations should start when the kids are young regarding physical actions such as pushing, touching, hugging or kicking. Children need to know that they themselves are in control of who they do, and do not allow to touch them in every shape, way and form.
Giving your kids the language to enforce those boundaries when they are young can help them feel more natural asking for and vocalizing consent later in life. For example, if they do not want to hug a cousin, it is important to support them so that they can see the cause and effect their words have with others actions.
As kids get older parents should include peer pressure in the consent conversation. Learning to care less about what others are doing, blazing their own trail and effectively "doing them their way" are important talking points. Additional discussions need to be had about consent and how consent for one thing does not mean consent for whatever may follow as well as discussions regarding how the word "stop" means that it stops right there whatever it is.
Children and teens need to not only understand consent but need to be taught what are appropriate verbal responses to an individual that does not respect their boundaries as well as what actions need to be taken after something occurs. For example, "no thank you", "please stop" or simply yelling "stop!" and then talking to the closest authority figure about what just occurred. To help ensure that this occurs, ask them what concerns or fears they might have about telling someone and then talk it through with them.
There is power in numbers (especially in childhood and adolescence) and the bystander effect is a big player in this dynamic. Your children are "first responders" as they see many things which occur that teachers and parents do not see in person or online. It is important to reinforce that if they see something, they need to say something.
Because we see so many kids who are significantly emotionally more (as well as less) mature than their actual physical age, it is difficult to say as a general rule at what age a child should be able to date. The American Academy of Pediatrics notes that on average, girls begin dating as early as 12 and a half years old, and boys a year older.
Things to consider here with regards to when they should or can date are:
- Does your child's emotional maturity come close to mirroring their physical age?
- How do they handle responsibilities such as homework, chores and dealing appropriately with authority?
- Do they have at least a decent amount of self-esteem and confidence? (It is not normally high during this stage of development)
- Would he or she come to you if something went wrong?
- Are they spending time one on one together or are they hanging out in groups? Middle school students typically have more of the group mentality which allows for less one on one time and potentially less opportunities to experiment with intimacy.
If your child comes to you wanting to date someone it's important that you ask them what their definition means, specifically to them. There are different levels to "dating" today versus when we were younger. There's "exclusive" where the kid's hookup with just each other but there is no formal commitment. "Official" is what we knew traditional dating to be where the individual is asked out and there is a commitment to one another.
One thing to keep in mind is that if you prohibit dating until 16-18 years-old, you may put yourself and your child into a difficult catch-22. If they do find someone that they are interested in and want to be together with but also know that you wouldn't approve at all, they are now forced to lie to you and hide everything. You lose the opportunity for them to circle back to you discussing what's occurring, bouncing situations off of you as well as coming to you for assistance when a problem arises and the communication lines have been effectively pinched. A high priority parenting goal as your child enters adolescence is to keep the communication lines open as much as possible.
If something significant does occur with your child, it is important that you go to the school and/or your local police department to download them on the situation. Most often approaching other parents directly significantly backfires and creates a bigger problem for both sets of parents, the kids themselves or for everyone.
With nearly a month of social distancing under our belts, I want to reach out and share a series of tools and tips to help you and your family stay sane during these challenging times.
Remember life before smartphones? Adults and kids alike had to meet up someplace to share experiences, socialize and to organize social events. Email made sending and communicating quick and easy, but you had to have access to a cable modem or phone line to login and retrieve your messages... While initially smartphones were almost exclusively used by adults, we quickly began putting these devices into the smallest of hands, allowing the power and broad scope of the internet into the intimate spaces of our lives and our children. Arguably, this single trend has done more to influence teenage behavior than any other event in history. Teenagers have an insatiable appetite for digital interaction and social media. According to a 2018 Pew Research Center Study on Internet and Technology, 95% of teens have access to a smartphone and 45% say they are online 'almost constantly.' Group chats and 'hangouts' replace hanging out after school or gathering on weekends to make plans. Being left out of one of these groups or removed from a group text can make a child feel like an outlier and bring them quickly to levels of anxiety and depression that used to take weeks or months of bullying and social exception to achieve. Research strongly suggests that human to human, hands-on interaction is the most beneficial for a child's socio-emotional development. Screen time has become the primary source of information and entertainment for children, and as a result has a negative effect on their socio-emotional development. In my experience and in my practice, we see children who because of the lack of human to human engagement have impaired empathy, low communication skills, and higher levels of depression and loneliness. So what should you do to help your child create a healthy balance between screen time and human contact? Here are some of my thoughts on ways to restrict your child's screen time without power struggles and family conflict: 1. Get them to sleep. The National Sleep Foundation recommends 9 hours of sleep a night. Enforce a power down at least one hour before bed. That means everyone in the family puts their phones away until morning. Charge devices in your master bedroom and invest in a good, old-fashioned alarm clock for your teen's room. If you want to allow music or audiobooks to assist your child in falling asleep, consider running them off a device placed in another room but connected by Bluetooth. 2. Limit screen time. The American Medical Association recommends no more than 1-2 Hours of screen time a day. If they need more time to complete homework or assignments, create 10-15 minute breaks every thirty minutes to stretch, walk the dog or have a snack. And no phones, computers or laptops in bedrooms - with access to the internet, teens will troll the social media sites and text until all hours of the morning. 3. Set boundaries and encourage social time. Set clear and consistent rules and expectation on screen time and make sure both parents agree and support it. Establish a no-phone at the table policy for everyone [including parents] when eating meals, whether at home or out. And, organize and facilitate in-person extracurricular activities, sports, hobbies and social get-togethers as much as possible. 4. Remember you are the role model. Practice and model the same behavior you want your kids to do. If you sneak your phone under the table, pick it up to read a text when they are talking to you or surf your social media all day long then your kids are going to see that and model that behavior as well. A good balance of social and family time is good for everyone!
A senseless tragedy like this is unfathomable, unexplainable and incredibly painful. As loving parents, or even simply just as human beings, it is our natural tendency to try and make sense of horrible situations-especially those that catch us off guard. We are never going to be able to make sense of tragedies, particularly ones that affect us so close to home. We will never know all of the details, and even if we did-we still would not be able to explain it to our children in a way that would make complete sense or in some way seem less unfair. If there is any silver lining to a situation like this, it is the opportunity for parents and kids to have more open dialogue about the struggles we all experience in life and to discuss the appropriate tools to combat them. Monday morning I was on campus to talk about the tragedy and the ways parents can help your children deal with the loss of a friend or loved one. What follows are some of the thoughts and advice I shared with the students, parents and staff of the Harbor Day School community. THOUGHTS AND ADVICE I SHARED WITH THE STUDENTS: When grieving, the more you can express your feelings, the faster you will get through the grieving process. You can express your grief not only through talking but also through crying, journaling, and creative outlets such as making videos or music. No two people grieve the same way, but there are several ways for you to process what you are feeling right now. Remember how Gianna, Mrs. Mauser, Kobe and all of the victims shared their life philosophies-either through words or by example. They would want you to use this opportunity to take the lead from them and to carry on doing the great and caring things they did for all of you. You can honor our loved ones by becoming a mental fighter. Kobe, Gianna and Mrs. Mauser would want you to fight by: Believing when things get tough you have to get tougher Knowing life never gives you anything that you cannot handle Don't give up fighting for yourself-don't let adversity beat you down. Use it to fuel you Convert your emotional pain and frustrations into productive energy to work harder and be as productive as possible Approach everything in your life with an "I've got this" mindset When you talk about Kobe, Gianna and Mrs. Mauser focus on the positives like telling funny stories, happy memories and discussing things you learned from them or admired about them. Remember them for their lives, not for the way they passed on. Try not to spend too much time in person or online getting wrapped up in the RIP memories, memorials and negative people. Too much negativity can lead to unhealthy levels of depression and anger. Accept that this tragedy happened in your past but focus on living in the present. You can do this by engaging your five senses to put yourself in the present. Close your eyes; what do you see, hear, taste, smell and feel on your body right now? MENTAL HEALTH TOOLS I SHARED WITH THE PARENTS As a parent, you can’t protect your children from grief, but you can help them express their feelings, comfort them and help them feel safer. Talk about adversity and how it is not simply, “Well, these things happen.” Getting through this is more about how we react and respond to tragedies and loss such as this. Ask your child how they are feeling and validate their response that it is normal to feel this way in situations like this. Children often ask about why bad things happen to good people or focus on how unfair this situation is. You can respond honestly by saying things like, “I honestly do not know,” or, “I agree with you. It is incredibly unfair.” Share your own reactions with your child; “It makes me feel really sad for the families.” Understand and watch for the stages of grief in your children; shock & disbelief, anger, bargaining, depression and then acceptance. These stages are not linear and can come in any order, at any time. Deal with your own reactions first. Children use parents as a social-reference and look to you for appropriate reactions to grief. While it is important for your children to see it is acceptable to be sad, upset or grieving, please know too much can negatively impact them. Take cues from your child. If your child wants to talk about this issue, be there for them. If not, allow them the space and time to process it. Do not volunteer too much information—it may be overwhelming. Instead, try to answer your child’s questions and do your best to answer honestly and clearly. Rumors are bound to come up and they can create a frenzy of new anxiety. If you have been hearing rumors about the deaths, chances are so has your child. Explain that some of the rumors may be true, but they are only part of the story and we have to be careful not to make judgements based on limited information. Your children might now be concerned about your passing. Don’t forget your social referencing cues and reactions. Respond simply and positively, “You have nothing to worry about. I plan to live a very long life.” Warning Signs: A drastic change in eating habits (more or less) If they are sleeping too much or too little Any significant drop in their grades If they do not have as much enjoyment in normally enjoyable activities Sudden concentration problems that did not exist before New complaints of body aches (headaches, backaches, stomachaches, etc.) that do not have a medical basis after being checked by a physician Social isolation A new level of irritability or a sense of becoming easily overwhelmed If you’re seeing any of these signs you should consider having your son/daughter evaluated with a professional. You just need one. If your child needs any assistance, The Weichman Clinic has child & adolescent psychologists specifically trained in grief, loss and trauma as well as depression, anxiety and stress related disorders. Let’s together do our best to honor the lives of the individuals who have passed by helping our children learn, change and grow not just from this situation but for life. This is the best way to take positives out of senseless tragedies and it is not only what those individuals would want, but what they stood for and how they lived their lives.
@drjerryweichman
We are parenting in the digital age, and it’s new to ALL of us. Teenagers today have so much more access to information than we ever did! While social media can be really great, it can be scary for us parents to let our kids roam free on their phones…
How can we teach our teenagers about proper social media usage? Swipe to find out, and follow me for more tips and tools to parenting in the digital age 📲
#ipadkids #parentingateen #parenting #parentingtips #parentingadvice
It’s OKAY if your teenager is struggling!
Learning how to face and conquer life’s challenges now is only going to better prepare them for their future, because as we all know, life CAN be a struggle sometimes.
It’s all about teaching our kids a “grow through what you go through” attitude! Every obstacle is an opportunity to learn, grow, and do better when the next one comes around.
#adversity #parentingadvice #parentingteens #teenmentalhealth
The new #MeanGirlsMovie is out, so I think it’s the perfect time to talk about what these girl groups look like IRL. 👀 How do these negative dynamics form, and how can we help our teenage daughters navigate them?
Cliques like this definitely exist, especially for middle school and high school girls. As these girls are forming their identity and trying to find their place in their friend groups, many of them naturally take on these different archetypes.
The best thing we can do for our teenage girls to help them overcome the “mean girls” in their lives, is to encourage their independence, confidence, and kindness. If your teen can break out of the tropes, stick up for herself and stand for what she knows is right, and identify different levels of friendship and how to tend to them, she’ll be okay.
If all else fails when it comes to mean girls, teach your daughter that you CAN and SHOULD walk away. Losing out on these “friends” is actually THEIR loss, because real friends should be the ones who are kind to you, let you be yourself and love you for it, and make you feel good.
Follow me for more tips on parenting a teenager!
#MeanGirls #teentherapist #teenmentalhealth #adolescentpsychology #adolescenttherapy
This is how your anxious teen feels! 🫨🌀
If your child is struggling with anxiety, they’re struggling with OMG thoughts. They’re constantly freaking out and spiraling in their mind… it’s all “OMG! OMG! OMG!”
If you cater to these (usually irrational) thoughts, you’re reassuring your teen that their fears are real and valid. Instead, you want to discourage the “OMG!” response, and help ground your kid back in reality.
Reach out to me for more help! 💙
#anxiety #anxiousteens #anxietysupport #anxietysymptoms #parentingtips
Parenting a teenager isn’t easy. In fact, it might feel impossible.
But when it comes to teens, the little things go a long way. Here are 6 simple ways to improve your relationship with YOUR teen today 👇🏻
💙 Your teen is growing up and seeking independence. This means re-negotiating the dynamic between parent and child. If you’re experiencing pushback and some edginess it’s probably coming from a place of trying to navigate a new dynamic. Give them grace.
💙 Parenting a teen isn’t easy, but being one is even harder. Try to remember what it was like being that age… now factor in all of the things teens TODAY have to deal with. It can be a lot on your kid.
💙 If you make everything a lecture, your teen is going to shut down and block you out. Make sure you’re still fostering a real relationship with them, not just the one where you’re the boss of them.
💙 On that note… lighten up with your teen! Everything in their life feels so serious and heavy right now. Laugh together. Have fun. You only have them for a few more years, and you’ll miss this time when it’s gone.
💙 Give your teen the independence they’re trying to find right now. They still love you, and they still need you, but they also need space to grow.
#teenagers #teenlife #lifewithateenager #parenting #parentadvice
If your teen has behavior issues, it’s time to change your parenting approach.
Behavioral parenting is about tangible consequences, NOT emotional responses! I like to call this method Police Parenting.
When you get pulled over, the officer gets all of the information, writes you a ticket, and moves on. There’s no engaging in the drama, there’s no bargaining or letting you off the hook, it’s just the officer doing their job. That’s the approach you need to take with your teen.
🚨 Don’t react, yell, or try to lecture. It’s all in one ear and out the other.
🚨Don’t take the things your kid does or says personally.
🚨Give real, tangible consequences to their actions. Grounding, taking away their devices, etc.
🚨Don’t hold a grudge. Let it go and set the example for your teen to move on, too.
#behaviormanagement #behaviorproblems #parenting #parentingtips #howtoparent #badkids
It’s time to have “the talk” with your teen… No, not THAT talk. I’m referring to the talk about substances!
The earlier kids are exposed to drugs and alcohol, the greater likelihood they have of developing an addiction in their lifetime, so it’s imperative that as parents, we educate our kids AND hold them accountable.
The reality is that most teens will experiment with drugs and alcohol. I recommend taking a proactive approach to help them understand what exactly these substances are doing to their brain, and offer better coping mechanisms.
I also recommend intermittent drug and alcohol testing to hold your kids accountable to staying sober. This strategy also gives your teen an excuse to say no to their friends while saving face and maintaining social stock.
Most importantly, trust your gut as a parent. In all of my experience, I’ve never seen a mother’s intuition be wrong.
If you have questions about how to lead the conversation with your teen, reach out to me!
#drugsafety #dare #stayingsober #parentingateenager #teenagers
One of the most common causes of unhappiness in today’s world… jealousy 👀
We live in a society where it’s almost impossible not to compare ourselves and envy what one another has. But being jealous of others means never being truly appreciative or satisfied with your own life. It can be a slippery slope, especially when you’re young and don’t quite know how to talk to yourself out of these envious feelings. Jealousy can lead to low self-esteem, bottled up anger, and depression.
Practicing gratitude with your kids teaches them how to combat jealousy and focus on their own successes! What are you grateful for today?
#jealousy #gratitude #practicegratitude #mentalwellness #selfimprovement
Your teen’s sleep habits might be making a real difference in their mental health… here’s how 🧠💤
Do you think your teen might be struggling with their sleep habits? Start setting boundaries as a family, like no screens in the bedroom or after a certain time, white noise machines, keeping the house cooler in the evening, waking up to natural light on the weekends, and practicing “wind down” time before at least 30 minutes before bed. You’ll be surprised at the difference a healthy bedtime routine makes for your teen, AND for you!
#sleephacks #sleepaid #sleeptips #teenagertips #parentinghacks
Teenagers can be manipulative. If yours is, it’s nothing to be concerned about! You just need to know how to deflect it.
Try this technique, and follow me for more tips on parenting your teen 📲
#parentingtips #parenting #parentingtricks #parentingadvice #parentingateenager
Are you bullying your teen? 🤔
HEAR ME OUT. As parents, the last thing we ever want is for our children to hurt. But sometimes we may not realize the implications of our actions, no matter where the intention comes from.
Consider these 5 acts and how they may be affecting your sensitive, developing teen. Then, look inward. Where is that coming from? What can you do to fix it?
If you need help navigating parenting with a teenager, follow along for more tips and reach out to me to discuss further!
#parentingtips #teenmentalhealth #howtoparent #innerchild #mentalhealthawareness
You have to STOP focusing on things outside of your control! 🤚🏻❌
Parents and teens alike are struggling so much with control issues nowadays. It leads to stress and anxiety, which leads to burnout, which leads to depression… and it’s pointless. You CANNOT control these things!
What you CAN control is your reaction, and your ability to set an example of stability for your teen.
For more tips and tools on managing your stress and control issues, give me a follow 🙌🏻 #control #losingcontrol #parenting #teenmentalhealth #parentingteens
It’s time for a talk 💬
This time of year is all about setting new goals, starting new habits, and all around bettering yourself. BUT as you may know, teenagers have a tough time with change... even if it’s a positive one. You need to make the transition slow and smooth, and they need to feel like this is something they WANT to do.
If you’re wondering how you can start implementing healthy habits into your family’s routine, here are a few Do’s and Don’ts to get started 👍🏻
#teenmentalhealth #healthyhabits #parentingtips #parentingateenager #howtoparent
If you’re dealing with a teenager, you’re probably also dealing with a lot of loud, aggressive arguments.
The most important thing to do in these situations is to not fight fire with fire ❌🤬🔥
Lowering your voice and remaining calm turns the fight back into a normal conversation, and models to your teen how to properly communicate their anger or frustration. Remember, YOU are setting the example for your kids!
If you have questions about dealing with aggression during the teen years, reach out to me.
#parentingstruggles #parentingstrategies #teenparenting #teenagers #parentingateenager #parentingteensishard
Let’s talk about mental health 🧠
If you’re sick, you rest, you take medicine, and you go to the doctor if things don’t get better.
If you’re injured, you treat the wound and seek medical help if things don’t get better.
Why should your mental health be any different than your physical health?
January is #MentalWellnessMonth, and what better way to kick off a new year than to start taking care of your mental wellbeing?
If you or your teen are struggling, follow me for all the mind medicine you need to improve 💙📲
#mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #teenmentalhealth #teentherapist #teentherapy
If your New Year’s resolutions include mastering the art of parenting a teen… Good luck! 😂🫡
But seriously, here are a handful of small ways you can work to be a “better” parent this year. Just remember that YOUR best is absolutely THE best for your kids.
Follow me for tips on parenting your teen all year long! 🌟
#parenting #parentingateen #newyearsresolutions #newyearnewme #parentingtips #dealingwithteenagers
I recently had the pleasure of speaking to the parents of OCSA about how they can provide support and respite to their teens during this very stressful time of year…
As we know, the holidays can be a time of heightened anxiety, between scheduling, dysfunctional family dynamics, and finals… but as parents, it’s our job to provide a stable and calm environment for our teens to escape to during their break.
Remember, your kids are looking to you to gauge the situation. If you’re overwhelmed, THEY’RE overwhelmed. Follow me for tools to keep you AND your family cool during this time.
And thanks to @weareOCSA for having me speak! If you’re interested in booking me for a speaking engagement, send me a message 💬
#OCSA #publicspeaker #psychologist #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthdvocate #mentalhealthmatters #teentherapy
This year, like the past few years, has been challenging. Especially for parents of teenagers who are struggling to develop a positive mindset.
While your teen is home for break, spend some time with them setting your 2024 resolutions. You too, mom and dad! What do YOU want to work on this year?
Setting these intentions together is going to do a few things:
✏️ You’re starting the year off with goals and a drive to complete them. Your teen needs motivation. Here it is!
✏️ You’re showing your teen that you have room to improve, too, and that you want to. You’re meeting them at their level instead of towering over them on a pedestal.
✏️ You’re not just forcing your teen to spend time with you- you’re doing something productive that shows them you’re invested in their wellbeing and development. Even if they act bugged, I bet they’ll appreciate the gesture.
These resolutions are just examples and starting points! Make your goals personal and achievable for you and your kids. Then throughout the year, acknowledge and praise them when they’re meeting the standards they set for themselves.
Let’s make 2024 a year of growth and positivity! 🥳🙌🏻
#newyear #newyearsresolution #2024 #nye #newyearseve #settinggoals #visionboard
Common misconception about therapy: “My kid should be able to talk to me!” ❌
As much as you want to be that person for your kids, the reality sometimes is that our kids DON’T feel comfortable confiding in us about what they’re going through.
It’s not because you’re doing anything wrong as a parent, it just might be easier for them to talk to an outside party about their struggles.
A therapist can be a good sounding board for your teen to vent, AND can become a vital part of your support system to provide real, effective solutions. Professionals like myself have techniques and strategies that are specific to working with adolescents, and we’re well-equipped to guide your teen through their unique situations.
If you have questions about teen therapy, reach out to me 📲 #teentherapist #teentherapy #adolescenttherapy #therapist #therapistsofinstagram #mentalhealth
This Christmas, the best gift you can give your teen is a relaxing and fun break… no matter how many times they’ve asked for new sneakers. 🙄
The holidays are a time filled with stress, pressure, emotions running high, and nothing going quite right. But they’re SUPPOSED to be a time filled with joy, gratitude, love, and relaxation. After all, this is the happiest time of year, right?
This year, treat you and your family to a mindful holiday season. It’ll be one you always cherish. 🎄
#christmas #christmaseve #holidayseason #happyholidays #holidaymentalhealth #holidaymindfulness
Everyone struggled during and after the COVID-19 pandemic, but parents and kids have had it unusually tough.
For so long, we had to adapt to life in quarantine. And when that ended, we were IMMEDIATELY thrust back into our pre-pandemic routines of work and school, extracurriculars, and so on. It was overwhelming to say the least.
And because of that, we didn’t have time to recharge our inner batteries and ease back into life as we know it. Now, a lot of us are operating on empty. It’s called dysthymia.
So how can you help yourself AND your teen recharge?
👉🏻 Exercise! Get up and moving, boost those endorphins, and work on getting your physical health up to lead your mental health in the right direction.
👉🏻 Rest! Sleep is so so so important (especially for teens!), and getting too little can have all sorts of negative effects on you including lack of focus, bad moods, and zero energy.
👉🏻 Work together! Your teen relies on you to support them and set the tone, so when you work on yourself, you show them that they should do the same. Plus, your support will motivate them (even though they won’t admit it to you!)
👉🏻 Show your affection! Your teen might pretend to hate it, but studies show that a kind physical gesture can immediately boost mood and provide comfort. A quick hug, a hand on the shoulder, or a pat on the back will give your teen that extra love they secretly need.
Want to know more about dysthymia and how you can combat it? Reach out to me! 📲
#dysthymia #depression #mentalhealth #mentalhealthstruggles #postpandemic #lifeaftercovid #therapist
My philosophy has always been that RESILIENCE is the key to overcoming your struggles with mental health. 🌟
This time of year, su*c*de rates are at their highest, and a lot of us might feel like our mental health is dwindling… but I firmly believe that we are never given anything we can’t handle with a little resilience.
As a parent, you want to take a proactive approach when it comes to helping your kids face their own challenges, not a reactive one. Get ahead of the battle by practicing and fostering resilience with your teen, and remember to lead by example! 💪🏻
Follow me for more tips, and reach out to me if you have questions.
#resilience #suicideprevention #mentalhealthmatters #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #therapist #teentherapy
As parents, we have a natural instinct to want to protect our children. So it can be hard to accept when something has happened that we had no idea about, nor any control over. 😕
If your teen is acting moodier than usual, having trouble sleeping, or experiencing things like night terrors or panic attacks… there might be something bigger going on there.
If you suspect your kid might be dealing with a hidden trauma, reach out to me for tips on how to approach it sensitively, as well as how to begin healing from it together as a family.
#childtrauma #traumarecovery #traumainkids #teentherapy #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness
Common misconception about therapy: “My kid is too young!” ❌
If you’re dealing with a teenager, this is the PERFECT time to get them into therapy! Not because anything is necessarily wrong, but because they’re navigating a whole new chapter of life without any tools to do so.
Seeing a therapist can help your child understand and resolve the regular conflicts teens face every day, from something as simple as dating or academics, to more complex and individualized struggles.
If you’re curious about what adolescent therapy might look like for your teen, reach out to me!
#teentherapy #teentherapist #therapyforteens #adolescenthealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #therapyiscool
One of my favorite quick tools for coping with outbursts…
The 3x3x4 Breathing Method is a tool I recommend for anxiety, anger, or extreme stress. Try it when you feel yourself getting worked up, or share it with your teen to help them manage their own overwhelming feelings.
Have you tried this yet? 👇🏻
#teenmentalhealth #teentherapy #therapyforkids #parentadvice #parentingateenager
Is your teen struggling with seasonal depression? ☁️
Seasonal depression is very real, and as a parent, here’s what you can do to support your kid and combat it:
☀️ Get some sun! Don’t let your teen sulk deeper into the darkness.
☀️ Exercise! You should already be encouraging healthy habits, but if your teen is dealing with depression, exercise will produce endorphins and provide them with some motivation.
☀️ Control YOUR stress! This time of year is exhausting and overwhelming. I know. But you need to set an example for your kid and provide them with stability they can lean on.
Need more advice dealing with seasonal depression? Send me a message, and hit that follow button for more tips 📲
#seasonaldepression #depressionhelp #depression #depressedteenager #parentingateen #holidaymentalhealth
It’s time for a talk 💬
Divorce is scary enough between you and your partner, but now you have to break the news to your kid, too. You’re probably wondering what to say and how to say it…
Every situation is unique, but here a few general Do’s and Don’ts to get you going. 👍🏻
#divorce #dealingwithdivorce #divorcewithkids #teenmentalhealth #parentingateenager #howtoparent
Wondering how you can convince your kid to go to therapy? 🤔
Let them have a choice in the matter!
The last thing you want to do is force them to go, or “mom bomb” them by taking them without even telling them.
Instead, show your concern and support, and if they are resistant, give them an opportunity to make a change without therapy.
This way, they’ll feel less attacked and be more willing to comply when they do eventually go. 👍🏻
#teentherapy #therapyforteens #therapyforkids #adolescenttherapy #mentalhealthmatters #teenmentalhealth
“Where is my mind at in time?” ⏰
Being anywhere but the present moment can have a serious impact on your peace of mind. If you’re stuck in the past or lodged in the future, you’re setting yourself up to feel out of control- and feeling out of control can lead to feeling a whole Pandora’s Box of other things.
Ground yourself in the present. Ground yourself in that feeling of control. Your mind will thank you for it.
This is an excellent tool to practice with your teen, too! If they’re feeling overwhelmed by sadness, anger, or worry, teach them the “Where is your mind at in time?” tool that you’ve learned. This should open the line of communication between you two, and show your teen how to pinpoint and control their negative emotions.
#mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mindfulness #teenmentalhealth #teentherapy #parentadvice
When do you KNOW your child needs therapy?
Look, EVERYONE could benefit from therapy, especially teens dealing with their first real struggles. But there comes a point where your kid might NEED therapy… and it’s your job to recognize the signs and get them the support they need!
If your teen is showing any or all of these signs on a regular basis, it’s time to find someone like me to help.
#adolescenttherapy #teentherapy #teentherapist #parenting #parentingateenager #mentalhealthmatters
The teenage years are HARD, and there are so many struggles your kid might have to face during this time in their lives. Heightened emotions, new exposures and experiences, and a lack of coping mechanisms all play a major role in the state of your teen’s mental health.
These are some of the most common things I see in my practice, and just a little bit on how you as a parent can support your child through them.
If your teen is dealing with anything like this, follow me for more detailed information and tools for coping and healing 📲💙
#teenmentalhealth #teentherapy #therapyforkids #parentadvice #parentingateenager #parentingstruggles
Therapy can be intimidating for anyone, ESPECIALLY a parent who wants to protect their child.
The thing is, EVERYONE deals with struggles and low points at some point in their lives. Therapy provides you and your kid with the tools you both need to effectively deal with those struggles now and far into the future 🌟
Still not convinced? Give me a follow! I’m here to help YOU, the parent, help your struggling teen.
#teenmentalhealth #teentherapy #therapyforkids #parentadvice #parentingateenager #parentingstruggles
Thanksgiving is just a week away?! 😬
I know how overwhelmed that thought might have just made you. The holidays can be a lot. You’re dealing with stressful events, dysfunctional family dynamics, financial worries… And HOW are you supposed to manage an anxious or stressed out teenager, when you’re spiraling yourself?
As a parent, it’s your job to set the tone for your family. If you’re on a tilt, your kid is going to go tumbling down with you. So first you manage your own stress and anxiety, THEN you show your kid how to do the same.
First you learn, then you teach.
Swipe for more detailed advice on getting through the holidays this year 💙
#thanksgiving #holidaystress #holidays #seasonaldepression #parentingadvice #parentingtips
Does your teenager deal with behavioral issues, mental health struggles, or other challenges?
Do YOU as a parent feel concerned, sad, frustrated, or maybe even at a loss when it comes to trying to help?
Hi, I’m Dr. Jerry Weichman, Founder of The Weichman Clinic. I have over 25 years of experience working with teens and their parents to provide them with the tools, support, and guidance they need to conquer whatever challenges they may be facing.
Parenting is hard. You’re definitely not alone in that.
But being a teen is hard, too.
Follow me for to learn more about supporting your kid through this challenging time in THEIR lives, and how to get through it as their parent. 💙
#teenhealth #mentalhealth #parentingateenager #teenanxiety #teenmentalhealthawareness #psychologist
This time of year means moving to college for many teens. The transition to college is exciting yet tough, for all parties involved. Hopefully with these tips, you can ensure a smoother move for you and your teen.
Summer means popsicles, chalk on sidewalks, and pool days when kids are younger. But when you have an adolescent, teens and their parents often have trouble creating a healthy structure and routine. Read above for tips for dealing with the Summer Slump.
Problems with self-confidence and self-esteem tend to arise in teens when they are basing their self-worth on things outside of them and their control. To regain that confidence, it is important to remember that it isn't important how other people see you, rather how you see yourself. We can help rebuild our teens' confidence by reminding them what characteristics make them so special on the inside.
Time management and procrastination are very common issues faced by preteens and teens, and begin to peak 7th-9th grade. These issues primarily come from multiple different sources – procrastination, being overwhelmed, distraction, and conditioning. Above are some common problems that contribute to time management issues, and some solutions to help you fix them.
Anxiety is the most common diagnosis in teens today, and often stems from negative thoughts about the future. With the tools shown above, you can help manage your anxiety.
Coping with depression? Try making these changes to your daily life. Exercising, sleeping regularly, maintaining a healthy diet, smiling, identifying the positives, and therapy are all ways you can alleviate symptoms of depression.
Experiencing symptoms of depression is nothing to be ashamed of. Depression occurs for all of us intermittently throughout periods our life. It's not that it occurs, it's having the tools to effectively treat and squash it.
Control is a big issue faced by parents and kids alike. We have a tendency to try to control the uncontrollable, for example how people act or behave, instead of focusing on things we can control, such as how we react and respond to situations. Learning how to take a step back and stop trying to control everything around you will have a positive effect on your mental health and will help you deal with situations in a more productive way.
I hope all is well with you. Thank you all so much for being patient with me during my absence as I've dealt with extended family health issues recently. I pledge to continue to be here to support you and your family as we work our way through 2023. Going forward, I want to know what type of content and topics you would like to see on this page! What have you liked? What have you wanted to see more of? Please let me know in the comments below what I should post about next. It's nice to be back. I look forward to hearing from you!
Dealing with tragedy can be a painful and confusing process. Whether we’re facing the shock of sudden loss or reliving sadness of the past, we need to continually check-in with ourselves and our families.
Parents, the best thing you can do for your family is to be available as a safe space of comfort and security.
“I’m here for you.”
“I love you.”
“I got you.”
Today’s school shooting in Texas leaves us with feelings of pain, fear, anger, grief, and sadness.
Here are some of my thoughts on ways to help you process this tragedy both on your own and with your children.
🤍
Parents, fight for time with your kids. Your children need a securely attached relationship with you to grow cognitively, emotionally, and socially!
Here are some of my own thoughts on why and how to do this…
Did you know prolonged sleep deprivation is highly correlated with Alzheimer's disease and Dementia?
Sleeping habits throughout life are foundational to our health. As a parent, one of the best things you can do to encourage health is to teach good sleep patterns!
Sleep is the best way to rest the brain and give it time to do the regular upkeep it does to keep us mentally and physically healthy. Even more importantly, sleep is essential for developing brains to grow and expand.
See the last slide to know how much sleep you need ➡️
#sleepbenefits #sleepdeprivation #sleeping habits #mentalhealth #teenmentalhealth #adolescentpsychology
It’s the time of year when high school seniors are hearing back about college applications. This can be a challenging season for parents and students alike.
Whether you or your child has been rejected or accepted into their favorite school, here are some KEY PRINCIPLES to think about & discuss during such a stressful time.
We cannot control outcomes in life. We can only control our responses and attitudes to what life throws our way.
How you use your time in college to develop yourself is often more important than where you end up going to school.
There is a process and flow to life. Things happen for a reason. Try to embrace the direction you’re heading in and have an open mind. You never know where life is going to take you.
Cultivating a strong connection with your child takes time and effort. For those of us who are parents, we can lose sight of the small moments and forget to cherish being with our kids. To cultivate connection, it is important to stay present in play, conversation, and even silence.
This applies to any human relationship! As humans, we desire to be seen, heard, understood, and safe.
In this post I explore some ways you can start cultivating connection in your own family.
Dysthymia is a low grade depression that has become increasingly common in light of the events in recent years.
This form of depression can easily go unnoticed and unacknowledged because it accumulates slowly over time.
If you or your child is losing interest in regular activities, feeling unmotivated, struggling with low energy, or is dealing with other symptoms of dysthymia, it is always helpful to go back to basics:
😴 Get plenty of sleep
💭 Avoid overthinking
🏃♀️ Prioritize daily exercise
#dysthymia #depression #teenmentalhealth
Dysthymia is a long term form of mild depression that occurs for at least 2 years. It can result in low self-esteem, hopelessness, and a loss of interest in activities that used to be energizing.
It is possible that many of us are struggling with dysthymia as a result of the life stressors that have taken place in the past years.
Things might seem to be going back to normal, yet you still feel a little bit “off”.
Read this post to learn about a few ways to rebuild positive momentum in your life.
#dysthymia #milddepression #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealth
Often, thinking creates probems while action fixes problems. When we use the mental magnifying glass to zoom in on the negative thoughts and ideas we have about ourselves, we can easily get into a vicious cycle of negative self-talk.
Negative self-talk can eat away at self-esteem and cause growing levels of anxiety.
Some things to keep in mind while managing our lives amidst more omicron exposures.
⏱ This is temporary. We will get through this.
🏃♀️ Exercise. Exercise. Exercise.
😴 Be sure you are getting enough sleep.
➡️ Share this with a friend! ➡️
#omicron #covid19 #resilience #mentalhealth #teenmentalhealth
Be kind to yourself in the new year. 💛
As we approach the end of 2021, you might start reflecting on the past year and setting goals for 2022. PLEASE REMEMBER, this pandemic has impacted our wellbeing, our emotion states, our productivity, and much more.
If you notice a lapse in your productivity this past year, BE KIND to yourself.
You are not defined by what you can accomplish. Your character is developed by the way you respond in the face of challenge.
#covid #mentalhealth #resilience #teenmentalhealth #perseverance #newyearsresolution
In a hyperactive, hyperconnected society, we have so many things competing for our mental energy.
How we manage stress and anxiety is critical to our ability to thrive in our mental health.
In this video, I cover a few strategies and thought patterns for both parents and their children to adopt when encountering stress and anxiety.
🔑 3 x 3 x 3 breathing calms the body down
🔑 Staying focused in the present moment keeps us
grounded in reality
🔑 Self talk influences the way we interpret situations
#teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #selftalk
Today is World Mental Health Day. This day is a great reminder that we can always be doing better to educate ourselves and others about mental health.
I created this post as a resource to parents who are concerned about suicide in the lives of their children. Suicide can be very difficult to talk about, but it is so crucial that we are equipped with the right tools.
#worldmentalhealthday #suicideprevention #teenmentalhealth #suicidalideation #suicidalintent
ARTS Group Therapy is our newest program at the Weichman Clinic! It took time to thoughtfully develop the modules, but we're finally introducing our first sessions of the program. If your child is dealing with stress in school, covid whiplash, social anxiety, or just needs to connect with their peers in an intentional way, this program can help!
ARTS is group therapy for teens that takes place on Saturdays at the Weichman Clinic.
Middle School groups: 10:00 AM - 11:30 AM
High School groups: 12:00 PM - 1:30 PM
📍Sign Up through the link in my bio!
Topics include...
✅ Awareness
✅ Acceptance
✅ Resilience
✅ (Re)Connection
✅ Transition
✅ Tools
✅ Self-Esteem
If you and your family are experiencing something that feels like whiplash, you’re not alone.
What is COVID Whiplash?
•••
Share this with someone who needs it!
#covidwhiplash #mentalhealth #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthmatters #psychologistsofinstagram #therapistsofinstagram
Bullying can come in many forms. Here are a few common manifestations of bullying among today’s youth.
As we transition back to school, our children will be encountering new social challenges and changes at a frequency they haven’t seen in over a year.
As parents, we need to be smart in how we talk to our kids about bullies and bullying incidents.
Here are a few things we can share with our kids about bullying.
🔑 People aren’t born as bullies
🔑 Bullies have their own insecurities and fears
🔑 Bystanders play a major role in preventing bullying
#bullying #preventbullying #mentalhealth #teenmentalhealth
Bullying occurs when one person sees an opportunity to take advantage of another to feel more powerful and more secure. These situations can come in many forms. In my next few videos, I’ll be talking more about bullying and how to overcome it as kid and a parent.
Our children are facing serious problems with digital devices. The risk of device & gaming addictions are real and are very present in today’s young population.
There are ways to curb addiction! Here are some easy strategies…
🔑 Establish phone-free environments for your family around the dinner table and in the evenings.
🔑 Use time limits on phones to help kids put them down.
🔑 Keep phones and gaming systems out of bedrooms.
#teenmentalhealth #preventdeviceaddiction
#mentalhealthawareness #deviceaddiction #gamingaddiction
What mental health issues are associated with device addiction?
Parents! Comment below your own helpful strategies or approaches for helping your children manage academic stress!
Here are a few of my own tips.
Why are academics so challenging for so many kids? It’s really hard to stay focused on something you don’t always enjoy. Here’s how we can support them...
When it comes to sports and performance, how can we teach our kids that effort is greater than outcome?
If you’re a coach or parent, share this on your story!
#parenting #effortoveroutcome #mentalhealth #distancingtogether #teenmentalhealth
As athletes, we can get stuck critiquing our own performance and overanalyzing our value to a team. Here are a few things to keep in mind to be mentally healthy in competitive sports.
With 650+ million worldwide users, Tik Tok is taking the Internet by storm. Here is what you need to know about the social platform.
#tiktok #deviceaddiction #socialmedia #mentalhealth #teenmentalhealth
Tik Tok is designed to trap users in continuous consumption. If you or your children use the platform, be aware of how much time is spent on it. #distancingtogether #mentalhealth #tiktok #socialmedia
The world of social media comes with many positives and many negatives. Don’t let the negatives that come from social media platforms take over your life!
#socialmediatips #stayhealthy #distancingtogether #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthmatters
The world of social media is an escape from reality. How can we learn to be in touch with reality and interact with social media in a healthy way?
Device addiction is one of the toughest challenges today’s youth will deal with.
#deviceaddiction #teenmentalhealth #parentingtips
The power of digital media is influencing our capacity for interpersonal connection. How can you protect yourself and your children from device addiction?
When talking about mental health, it is always a good idea to bring a mental health professional into the conversation.
#mentalhealth #teenmentalhealth
Mental health can be a very sensitive conversation to have with family and friends. It’s important to maintain healthy boundaries and to keep relationships strong while having these types of conversations.
#talkingaboutmentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #teenmentalhealth
Remember to stay in the present. The here and now is the only moment of in time when we can take action. Your own actions have the power to transform your thoughts and feelings.
When we focus too much on the future we paralyze ourselves with doubt and anxiety. When we focus on the past, we beat ourselves over things we cannot control. Keep you and your child’s thoughts in the present.
#mentalhealth #bepresent #thehereandnow #drjerryweichman #mentalhealthexpert #teenmentalhealth
The Mind-Body Connection is such an important thing to understand when dealing with you and your child’s well-being. Everything is connected! Here are some ways to use it to your advantage.
#parentingtips #mindbodyconnection #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealth #psychologistsofinstagram #therapistsofinstagram #newportbeach #orangecounty
Smiling is a simple yet very powerful tool we can use to stay mentally healthy. We can use this example mind-body connection to stay positive and persevere through difficult situations.
#teenmentalhealth #parentingtips #therapistsofinstagram #psychologistsofinstagram #distancingtogether
The internal dialogue that we have with ourselves throughout the day can either be a blessing or a curse.
Perpetuate positive and supportive thoughts throughout the day to be proactive against anxiety and depression.
Maintaining a healthy internal dialogue is really important for your mental well-being. Think positive thoughts and be a force for encouragement in yout own mind, rather than a force for frustration and discouragement. #mentalhealth #teenmentalhealthawareness #teenmentalhealth #therapistsofinstagram #parentingtips
The “I’ve Got This” Mindset is a tool I’ve relied on when I need to push through a challenge. Sometimes, in order to be resilient, we have to tell ourselves to be resilient.
#therapistsofinstagram #psychologistsofinstagram #teenmentalhealth #resilience #mentalhealth
It’s easy for us to talk to ourselves in a negative way and be hard on ourselves. The “I’ve Got This” Mindset is something to go back to in order to replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts. Overthinking a situation only causes more problems. Feel free to share this video with someone who would find it helpful.
#mentalhealthmondays #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthexpert #therapistsofinstagram #psychologistsofinstagram
Nearly 1 in 10 of American Youth are dealing with Severe Major Depression. Today’s teens have a lot on their plate. It’s okay to not be okay and it’s important to reach out for help.
source: @mentalhealthamerica
#distancingtogether #therapistsofinstagram #psychologistsofinstagram #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthamerica
Self-esteem is built on the character you have inside of you. I believe that quiet confidence is the best way to build up self-esteem. When you have self-esteem, it’s easier to take risks in life without worrying about what people think of you.
#distancingtogether #quietconfidence #selfesteem #teenmentalhealth #therapistsofinstagram
Life is challenging right now. We’ve been dealt a tricky set of cards. In order to understand our mental health during this time, we need to understand how the pandemic is changing our social and cultural environment.
What are you doing to stay active and maintain purpose during this time?
#distancingtogether #covid19 #stayhealthy #staymentallyhealthy #mentalhealthawareness #teenmentalhealth
When life gets tough, we need to get tougher. In order to be mentally healthy, you need to be a mental fighter. Resilience is the key to maintaining your self confidence and pushing forward. #mentalfighter #resilience #distancingtogether #teenmentalhealth
#letsgetpractical I talk a lot about perspective. Perspective is a great way to see your situation in a different light. The way you feel about your circumstance may not necessarily reflect reality. How can you establish perspective in your life? Here are some tips of my own. Let me know what you think!
Your perception of your situation may not be reality. Seek perspective to pull yourself out of an unhealthy mindset. For me, I find that talking to others about my feelings and journaling about my circumstances can help me determine what is true and what is false about my situation.
#seekperspective #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #therapistsofinstagram #distancingtogether
When life seems to be going into a tailspin, it’s really important to look for perspective. It’s easy to get caught up in negativity when you view everything through your own set of lenses. Gain perspective to better understand your situation.
#mentalhealth #teenmentalhealth #newperspectives #staygrounded #therapistsofinstagram #psychologistsofinstagram
When it comes to staying mentally healthy, the little things add up. Keeping yourself and your personal spaces organized and clean will make you feel better. The intention you put into your organization can be the small thing to tip the scales in the positive direction. #endthestigma #mentalhealth #mentalhealthexpert #teenmentalhealth #distancingtogether #stayingorganized
It’s easy to overlook the small things in life but sometimes the simple things like your personal hygiene or organizational skills can have a large impact on your mental health.
#letsgetpractical as we talk about some ways to find the positives in every situation. Here are some thoughts and strategies!
In the peaks and valleys of life, it’s so important to see the good in every negative situation. #flipthescript #staypostive #teenmentalhealth #adolescentmentalhealth #distancingtogether #staysafe
#letsgetpractical • This week I posted a video about Focusing on Others. To follow up on my thoughts, here’s a little challenge for you! Here are 4 ways to #focusonothers in the next couple days. Pick one or two and challenge a friend to do the same! #distancingtogether #teenmentalhealth #mentalhealthexpert #socialdistancing #mentalhealthawareness #therapistsofinstagram #psychologistsofinstagram
Why is it so important to focus on others? Listen to Dr. Jerry’s take on how focusing on the benefit of others can make everyone, including yourself, more mentally healthy.
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#distancingtogether #teenmentalhealth #pediatricmentalhealth #mentalhealth #anxiety #theweichmanclinic #therapistsofinstagram #psychologistsofinstagram
When people ask me for practical ways to stay mentally healthy throughout day to day life, I always bring up 3 x 3 x 3 breathing. This breathing technique will help you take the edge off when you feel stressed. Share it with someone who might benefit!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
#mentalhealth #teenmentalhealth #breathingexercises #breakthestigma #mentalwellbeing
The more we try to control things in our lives, the more stressed and anxious we get. Stay focused on your own responses, behaviors, and actions to prevent unnecessary anxiety.
From @patricks_purpose_foundation
“There is nothing more courageous than speaking out about your personal mental health struggles, and we are so encouraged by the stories that have been shared recently from friends and strangers alike.
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Today, on #worldmentalhealthday, we want to encourage everyone to make mental health a priority💙💙💙 #pt26 #beinclusive “
Everyone is affected by mental illness. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. #breakthestigma #mentalillnessawarenessweek
Share this with someone you love. Comparison is only going to hold you back. Stop comparing yourself and start running your own race. #mentalillnessawarenessweek
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